Go Back   Friends and Family Forum > The Family Forum > All Grown Up

All Grown Up A place to discuss "adult" children.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old March 2nd, 2014, 06:01 AM
seema seema is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2014
Posts: 1
seema is on a distinguished road
Angry Problem Sister

My sister is doing her graduation. During schooling she was in a relationship with the son of my father's driver. We make her understand that he is just playing with her emotions, as he knew that my mom and dad both are working and I also reside out of town, so my sister is an easy catch. We make her understand that and she also came to know by herself that he is using her, so she break-up with him.

Now, she met some random guy on facebook, and saying she is in relationship with him. She is in contact with him through chats, phone and messages. Even she has shared some compromised snaps of her [That I find out on checking her mails].

I can't understand what to do? What she want from her life?

For my parents sake, because of first incident I am living at her in another city, sacrificing my career. Started motivating, trusting and being totally normal with her so that she don't felt hurt or rejected from the family. But now her actions are totally disturbing me and I can't tell my parents about it.
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old March 2nd, 2014, 07:40 AM
snafu's Avatar
snafu snafu is offline
future crazy cat lady
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Mid-west
Posts: 10,470
snafu has a reputation beyond reputesnafu has a reputation beyond reputesnafu has a reputation beyond reputesnafu has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Problem Sister

How old is your sister?
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old March 2nd, 2014, 01:57 PM
KayKay's Avatar
KayKay KayKay is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Location: Texas
Posts: 16,340
KayKay has a reputation beyond reputeKayKay has a reputation beyond reputeKayKay has a reputation beyond reputeKayKay has a reputation beyond reputeKayKay has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Problem Sister

Why can't you tell your parents about it? Your sister is not your responsibility. She is theirs. And why are you checking her emails? If she isn't an adult, isn't that your parents' responsibility?

If your sister was ill or had some reason where she was unable to care for herself, it would be kind of you to sacrifice your career to step in and help her. As far as I can tell, your sister has no reason that she can't be responsible for her own actions and decisions. I think you will end up unhappy and resenting her in the long run if you continue to sacrifice yourself for her bad decisions and choices. At some point, you will have a spouse and children of your own who will need to take precedence over her.

Just my opinion.
__________________
Expecto Patronum!
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old March 3rd, 2014, 01:14 AM
Mrs X's Avatar
Mrs X Mrs X is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 3,917
Mrs X has a reputation beyond reputeMrs X has a reputation beyond reputeMrs X has a reputation beyond reputeMrs X has a reputation beyond reputeMrs X has a reputation beyond repute
Re: Problem Sister

Hi Seema, Are you an older brother looking after a younger sister, who is now doing post-graduate study in a different place? - I've seen this happen with families from the middle east. In this culture, maybe it is thought that an adult woman cannot adequately look after herself if she is unmarried. - Indeed most western and Asian people will assume that the brother in this situation is probably an unreliable teenager, and that the sister is saddled with looking after him. (!)

Because your situation is so alien to what we understand of family relationships, this is probably not your best forum to come to for advice, you aren't going to like any of it.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 03:58 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.7.3
Copyright ©2000 - 2021, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright 2007, The BlueSparks Network