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Old October 27th, 2009, 08:45 AM
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Cremebrulee Cremebrulee is offline
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Re: New Thread for Seeking Sensibility

Quote:
Originally Posted by LucyVanPelt View Post
I don't usually get into these threads because I have nothing to add. However, I've made 2 observations over time:

1) Once someone is labeled, the odds of a good resolution fall dramatically. Now one no longer has to be responsible for their own behavior because the other person is evil, meanspirited, or broken beyond repair.

2) Although some insist they are not interfering, they voice very strong opinions about matters that are NONE OF THEIR BUSINESS, such as how the other person was raised, what a person does in their own home, what their personal beliefs are, how they raise their children, how they arrange finances and marital responsibilities, and so on. Chances are, if you were minding your own business, you wouldn't know enough about these things to make judgment, and then label the other person, leading right back to the first point.

It's a vicious cycle and all parties should just stop. Mind your own business, stop labeling, and own your contribution to the bad relationship.
chances are, in the beginning, if she had sat down and discussed with me, why she was angry at me, instead of running in and out of the bedroom while I was there, pretending to have a headache, and then when hubby came home, she was as sweet as pie, the other issues, that I should have nothing to say about, wouldn't have come up. But when you treat people miserably...nasty and aloof, these other things that ARE none of my business now become an issue...I have never voiced any opinion to her about any of these things...I was simply angry and venting online...and I believe your opinion is valid, while you see only what you want to see....haven't you ever been hurt by someone, then you get angry by the rejection and spout off about things that have nothing to do with the issue at hand?

what about the things she did to me? What about my feelings...? If I only knew what I did...when someone rejects you and give you nothing to work on...everything else becomes huge problems...that is human nature...right or wrong...I didn't mean anything by it...it just becomes a defense mechanisum and you wonder, what kind of life your son's living if it is so easy for her to shut you out...cut you off and drive a wedge between you and your son. Then you start to wonder,,,,What could my son be thinking, he knows me better then anyone...then I say to myself....Creme, if it were you, if you were your son, what would you do? He loves her, she is the love of his life.

Last edited by Cremebrulee; October 27th, 2009 at 10:10 AM.
 

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