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Becca
July 1st, 2008, 12:19 PM
My best friend was talking about her DH and said he would be babysitting the kids this week.

A few months ago DUIL was telling DH and I that his DS hates to babysit his own kid so DUIL picks up his grandson from daycare and takes care of him until his DIL gets off of work.

Why do ppl say that the father is babysitting or hates to babysit? It's their child. They're not babysitting, they're doing their job, taking care of their child. You don't hear ppl say, oh the mother is at home babysitting the kids.

This just bothers me.

1dilwhosreal
July 1st, 2008, 12:49 PM
It bothers me too, Becca. So I'm pretty blunt about it. If someone asks if DH is babysitting tonight, I respond, "He's their father, how can he babysit them?"

nonnymouse
July 1st, 2008, 02:12 PM
My best friend was talking about her DH and said he would be babysitting the kids this week.

A few months ago DUIL was telling DH and I that his DS hates to babysit his own kid so DUIL picks up his grandson from daycare and takes care of him until his DIL gets off of work.

Why do ppl say that the father is babysitting or hates to babysit? It's their child. They're not babysitting, they're doing their job, taking care of their child. You don't hear ppl say, oh the mother is at home babysitting the kids.

This just bothers me.I like the way you think, Becca. My DH doesn't babysit our kids either...he parents his children. End of story.:)

Is it hard for him to care for three alone on the rare occasion I am out. Yes. Sometimes it is. It is never 'babysitting' though.:rolleyes:

I appreciate that he knows it is hard work. "I couldn't be a stay at home mom." Is a phrase he says that means "I appreciate what you do, Nonny." And sometimes, "I've had all I can take for a bit, Nonny. I need a break from them." :)

KayKay
July 1st, 2008, 02:13 PM
LOL... I *do* say that I have to babysit DH on his days off. :rolleyes:

Maybe it comes from the difference between babysitting and mothering? :confused: Moms tend to do more than just "babysit", and *some* dads (not all, by any stretch of the imagination) do less nurturing. We tend to say (in our family) that DH will "watch" the kids, or "stay" with the kids... not "babysit"... when I have something I have to do. But there was (when the kids were little and required more "watching") a definite distinction between the level of my involvement and the level of DH's involvement. :rolleyes:

grubby
July 1st, 2008, 02:28 PM
Its not baby-sitting, its called parenting. :rolleyes:

Yes, it bugs me, it also bugs my DH too, at times. (At times, I only wish I was the babysitter, lol).

KayKay
July 1st, 2008, 05:35 PM
A few months ago DUIL was telling DH and I that his DS hates to babysit his own kid so DUIL picks up his grandson from daycare and takes care of him until his DIL gets off of work.

Really though, in restrospect I think you've answered your own question. The DS hates to _____________ his own kid so DUIL does it until DIL gets off of work. They say "babysit", but it sounds like that blank could be filled with a lot of different things... "parent", "bond with", "be a dad to". :(

Not thinking that the DS wins "Father of the Year". :(

latelearner
July 1st, 2008, 08:06 PM
My BIL would always get upset with DH whenever DH would turn him down to go golfing every Sunday or so. DH works alot of hours and Sundays are precious to him because he likes to spends time with our kids. BIL claims this to be DH "babysitting" the kids. Is it because he isn't a father himself?

HisHeathenHoney
July 1st, 2008, 08:44 PM
My BIL would always get upset with DH whenever DH would turn him down to go golfing every Sunday or so. DH works alot of hours and Sundays are precious to him because he likes to spends time with our kids. BIL claims this to be DH "babysitting" the kids. Is it because he isn't a father himself?


Could be. Many people without kids totally don't get that (a) you have to spend time with them, and (b) even more amazing, you WANT to spend time with them! And men are more prone to this, though women can do it too. Men seem somewhat more likely to stay that way after having kids, though (but again, women can do that, too.)

I'm lucky to have a DH who loves his kids and wants to spend time with them and comes with activities and stuff. :) It gets me over the fact that we've lived in this house 6 years and he still doesn't know where the dishwasher is. :rolleyes: